Boundaries

Shannon Burton, SXI is a queer-kinky-poly sex & relationship coach based in New Orleans. They have been writing about and researching boundaries since 2017.


Compromise is a cornerstone of healthy relationships. However, there’s a difference between compromise and crossed boundaries. 

Whether your relationships are new or long-term, casual or serious, nested or solopoly, hierarchical or anarchic, fidelitous or open, boundary communication skills are essential for establishing (and re-establishing) relationship harmony.

The Boundaries eBook

Saying No With Shannon: How to Identify, Set, and Enforce Your Boundaries

This step-by-step guide helps you outline your limits and create boundary-setting scripts for daily life.


Read: 10 Boundaries for Happy Polyamory

You can’t have happy, healthy nonmonogamy without boundaries.

Watch: Happy, Healthy Polyamory

My recorded webinar all about setting boundaries and making agreements.

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Who is Shannon?

Shannon Burton, SXI

Hey there! I’m a sex coach, a recovering people-pleaser, and a huge fan of the word ‘no’.

My sexuality-centered work requires a lot of familiarity with boundaries and enforcing them.

As someone raised to put others’ needs before my own, I struggled to say ‘no’ for most of my childhood and young-adult life.

It wasn’t until a therapist showed me how poor boundaries were keeping me constantly stressed, depressed, and anxious that I finally started taking real steps to say ‘no’ to sources of strain in my life.

Saying ‘no’ completely transformed my relationships with family members, friends, partners, bosses…pretty much everyone I interact with. It allowed me to carve out time for rest, self-care, and self-reflection so that I could be my best self.

I provide both in-person and virtual boundaries coaching.

Have trouble maintaining your boundaries, or aren’t even sure what they are?

You might need a boundaries coach.

A lack of boundaries isn’t necessarily a sex problem–though it often comes up in sex coaching. You may find many areas of your life affected by a lack of boundaries with:

  • family members
  • friends
  • partners
  • colleagues
  • bosses
  • yourself

…or a combination of these people.

Many people who struggle to identify and maintain their boundaries experience things like:

  • feeling overwhelmed with responsibilities
  • feeling taken advantage of
  • an inability to say “no”
  • stress and/or anxiety
  • lacking a sense of “self”
  • high aversion to disappointing others
  • high drive to seek approval from others

Looking for support on your journey to better boundaries? Book a free discovery call to learn how I can help:

How I help people:

I meet clients on Zoom or at my French Quarter location in New Orleans. First-time coaching sessions with new clients are virtual.

As a coach, my role is to:

  1. honor my clients’ trust and confidentiality
  2. gain a complete understanding of clients’ goals
  3. provide accurate, safe, fact-based information and guidance to help clients have the life they desire and deserve

This looks a little different depending on each individual. However, there’s a typical flow that works for most situations—

What happens during an initial coaching session:

During your initial session, I’ll ask clarifying questions about what brings you to coaching. Then, I’ll make recommendations or brainstorm options with you for setting goals and/or milestones.

Depending on your goals, I’ll likely suggest one or more exercises to try on your own. Exercises are based completely on your comfort level and do not have to be performed during a coaching session if you’re not comfortable with that.

Sex Coach Shannon

Shannon Burton, SXI is a professional sex coach certified through a program aligned with American College of Sexologists standards. Book a free 15-min discovery call today.

Have questions before you book? Email hello@sexcoachshannon.com to find out if a consultation is right for you.